The thing about being alone is that it’s not lonely. Oftentimes it’s lonelier being around people than it is when you’re by yourself. I’ve certainly felt that way often in my life. The other thing about being alone is that there’s no one there. I know that sounds obvious, but it’s important. Everyone feels things. Regardless of who you are or your circumstances emotions will find you. Those are the moments when not having someone to share whatever with becomes a problem. That may sound like loneliness and in that moment perhaps it is. I’m no expert, we can feel many things simultaneously. While all of that is true just having people around you doesn’t fill that void. Being alone can isolate you from loneliness the same way being around others can make it cripplingly clear. The question at the heart of My Teen Romantic Comedy SNAFU! (we’ll call it OreGairu going forward) is about the nature of loneliness. What is it? How does it feel? What does it make us do? Is it even bad to feel lonely? So many of the characters are constantly trying to prove they can do things on their own. Is it okay to rely on others to help yourself? OreGairu manages to tackle these questions from all sorts of angles and I’m going to use this piece to explore loneliness and emotions through the characters in this story. Also I’m going to end this article with a big old rant, so that should be fun. Buckle up, this is going to be a long one.
I’m not a teenager, but this show is only kind of for teenagers. It’s really more about youth, which makes sense as like all of these stories it is created by an adult, Wataru Watari. (A man who clearly styled his characters’ names after his own.) Maybe it’s just because I’m old now, but I see the show through a reminiscent lens. While I certainly relate to a character like Hikigaya, I also now relate to a character like Ms. Hiratsuka a lot as well. My favorite thing about the show is that it’s all about the characters, the plot is generally pretty superfluous. It’s just a means to end, which is perfect because all plots are stupid. (I’ll write about this some other time.) This focus on character is perfect for the kind of examination I’m about to do.
Before going any further you might want to check out my previous works on the show. I wrote about the season 2 finale and the love triangle here, and I wrote a running diary of the final season here. Now let’s start with:
Hachiman Hikigaya
Hachiman Hikigaya is alone and he likes it that way, thank you very much. At least that’s what he’d tell you. Let’s just be honest, when the show starts Hikigaya is a real prick. The show opens on him monologuing about how youth is a lie. We see him walk around the school internally judging all those fools who care. He’s managed to make it to second year of high school completely under the radar. He walks around hunched over, hands in his pockets, and trying to make himself as inconspicuous as possible. We see through his monologue how he was unpopular in middle school and after misunderstanding how a girl was treating him he was rejected. He has taken this as a sign to isolate. As long as he is alone the world can’t hurt him. And to be fair it’s working for him. His grades are fine and his jaded personality and self-deprecation inoculate him from others. You could say the only person he’s hurting is himself. That changes when his teacher, Miss Hiratsuka forces him to join the Service Club after reading his essay on youth.
There he meets Yukino Yukinoshita and their chemistry is instant. Later in the premier he meets Yui Yuigahama and thus begins the story. As a loner, joining the Service Club is quite the challenge for Hikigaya. He has strong opinions on the world, which make helping others seemingly outside of his abilities. However Miss Hiratsuka is hoping that by being forced into social situations will force him to work with others and challenge his preconceived notions about life. He needs to learn that you can’t apply the actions of individuals to everyone and that his experiences aren’t the only ones that matter. He feels that life is pointless but that’s not true. Life doesn’t have to be pointless, but yours can be if you let it. He is so isolated at school that his classmates don’t know his name. He is a doting older brother to his sister Komachi. Through this relationship we see that he is capable of being a nice guy.
The first personal conflict for him revolves around the time he was hit by a car on the first day of high school. We find out that the dog he saved was Yui’s and that the car was Yukino’s. This changes how he feels about these relationships. He believes that Yui is just being nice to him out of pity. He describes this is his inner monologue about why he hates nice girls. He’s not totally wrong in his reasoning, but because he’s living in absolutes, he struggles to grasp the intimacies of human interaction. He can’t accept that others may have actual feelings and care about him because he’s afraid of getting hurt. His conflict with Yukino is more about how he feels he has forced his image of her onto her. He’s not mad about the car crash, but he is struggling with how he feels about himself. He says he is feeling self hatred for the first time because of his guilt over how he forced his perception on Yukino. Ultimately with the help of the club they are all able to get through these problems. We also get to see how he deals with the problems that are brought to the club. His general solution is to try to find a way to help without actually confronting the root of the issue. We see this with Hayama’s request and when they all try to help the kid on the camping trip. When those methods fail he defaults to making himself the enemy. He does this throughout the culture festival. The problems with this approach are twofold, it doesn’t actually fix anything and by treating himself as expendable he hurts those that care about him.
This tendency to self sacrifice comes to a head on the class trip. He is trying to balance the requests of Tobe, Ebina, and Hayama. Their requests all seem to be conflicting. Without telling Yui and Yukino he decides that the way to handle it is to once again make himself the bad guy. He stages a false confession to Ebina that serves to fulfill everyone’s requests. However by doing this he breaks something in his relationships with Yui and Yukino. Yukino completely rejects his methods and his actions force Yui to tears. This not only forces him to recognize the feelings of the girls, but also to realize that they matter to him. He has a conversation with Ebina after the trip where she tells him that like her he finds it easier to be honest with people he doesn’t care about.
He and Yui both work to stop Yukino from being student council president because they believe she doesn’t want it. This causes a rift in the group and he stops spending time at the club. He starts helping Isshiki with her student council president duties because he feels he owes her. He is not the type of person to turn down someone asking for his help. In meetings with another school he runs into a girl from his middle school, Kaori. We met Kaori a few episodes earlier and we see why Hikigaya is the way he is through her treatment of him. She is all false sweetness and casual cruelty. We also see his willingness to let others treat him like crap. His experiences without the club lead him to a realization. He goes to the club and sits on the other side of the desk. He tells them he wants something genuine and asks for their help. This is the first time we have seen him really take an emotional risk and put himself out there. This reestablishes the club and they begin to work together again. With the club back together they solve the issues around the student council Christmas pageant.
While he asks for something genuine he is still not prepared for it. He is still hiding his feelings and outright refuses to ever admit that he is ever just hanging out with someone. This usually happens around Yui and you can always see the pain it causes on her face. He is forced to really confront his feelings at the end of season 2 by both Haruno at the Valentine’s chocolate event and then Yui when she brings Yukino and him on a date to the aquarium. This sets him up for the final season. If I had to describe his feeling about the girls at this point I would say his relationship with Yui is comfortable and dependable, while with Yukino it is all consuming, when they’re together it feels like they are in their own world.
We start his final season by seeing him cry for the first time. He is having a conversation with Komachi where she thanks him for all of his help over the years. Through this relationship we see that has actually always had the ability to help people and has been helping his sister for years. His tears are an undeniably real emotion.
The triangle starts to come to a head at the practice prom. It feels like at this point he is genuinely conflicted over his choice and he has moments with both Yui and Yukino. That changes when the prom is put in danger. When he gets the notification that the prom is in danger he instantly wants to go help Yukino and even though he sees that Yui is teary, he lets her convince him that it is not a big deal and he rushes off to help Yukino, even though he know she does not want his help. Whether he knows it or not this is when he makes his choice.
Here we get another one of Yukino and his fights where they do everything in their power to use as many words as possible to make the simple complicated. Ultimately the only way he can find to help Yukino without doing it directly is to propose a competition as to who can make the prom happen. The stakes here are all personal as neither of them actually care about the prom itself. It’s wild that his plan to save the prom is just like all of his other plans, as he wants to create a fake prom proposal that is so bad that the original prom is forced to happen. This is a terrible plan. During the course of putting the fake prom together he is working with Yui. While doing this he is tasked to talk to Hayama, but he runs into Yukino on the way. Once he sees her, all other things are driven from his mind and he ignores what he told Yui he would do to talk to Yukino. When he does talk to Hayama the next day it is shown how they need each other. They perfectly balance each other out as Hayama is popular and unwilling to sacrifice anything, which is the opposite of Hikigaya. Ultimately he is able to save the prom by using the time he was hit by the Yukinoshita car to guilt her mother into helping make the prom happen. However, he denies his victory in the competition and forces the victory on Yukino. This passivity is his worst trait as it puts others in a spot to be hurt emotionally. Yukino ultimately orders him to make Yui’s wish come true.
The problem with this is that he can’t make Yui’s wish come true. Well more accurately he can’t make all of it come true. He’s caught in a trap of his own making at this point. I can’t say for sure what his feelings are for Yui, but he seems reluctant to be alone with her, especially when she invites him over. He reveals in his internal monologue that as much as he would like to, he can’t make all of her wishes come true. Because he’s been unwilling to make a choice he puts everyone in a terrible spot. He cries during Meguri’s speech at graduation and in their conversation after he does seem to understand that something must change. After conversations with Haruno and Hiratsuka he decides that it’s time he ends the current fake, broken relationships he has and to try for something truly genuine. He tells Yui that the one thing he can’t live with is not associating with Yukino. He knows that he is not capable of keeping a relationship with her if they are not officially associated in some way. He won’t reach out, they won’t stay in touch and will drift apart. He can’t accept that as he is consumed by her. He needs her in his life.
He brings back his fake prom and tries to make it real. He does this to set up the conditions to make Yukino’s wish come true. He knows that pulling off this prom will force Yukino’s mom to recognize her. He also uses this to bring Yukino back into his life. For the first time in his confession to Yukino he says he wants to be with her. Not out of obligation or responsibility, but out of desire. Because he’s him he can’t just make a simple “I love you” confession and has to complicate it. He says he wants to distort her life and to keep on distorting it for as long as she will have him. He promises her all of himself. At school the next day he sits next to her at the table in the club room, which he has never done before. He usually sits off to the side of the table. By the end of the Hikigaya has grown and come to understand that youth isn’t a lie and that relationships, for all of the pain, are worth it. Being a part of a community isn’t fake and relationships can be very real.
Yukino Yukinoshita
Yukino Yukinoshita seemingly has it all. She’s beautiful, intelligent, and comes from a rich family. Then why does she look so lonely? We meet Yukino as she is sitting all alone in the club room. While Hikigaya has put all his energy into isolating himself, Yukino has spent her whole life being isolated by others. She believes in hard work, she thinks a lack of talent isn’t an excuse for not achieving. She has always struggled to make friends because her smarts and beauty have intimidated others. She is also very blunt and does not lie (although she does obfuscate when she wants to). Because of her lack of friends and her family situation she actually lacks confidence in how to deal with other people. She likes cutesy things, especially cats and Pan-san, a panda mascot character. Her goal when dealing with problems is to solve the root of the problem.
When she meets Hikigaya their chemistry is instant. Their banter immediately plays off of each other and it is cackling. Yui is her first real friend and she is surprised when Yui tells her that she likes her. She retreats from Hikigaya after he finds out the truth of the car accident. This sets off the first in a chain of her and Hiki being in a constant circle of conflict and resolution.
When she takes on the planning of the culture festival as part of a request we see that she can’t just be a part of something. She immediately takes command of the planning and when things aren’t going well she takes all of the work upon herself. This pushes her to get sick from overwork and miss a day of school. She does not have good stamina, but never asks for help. However, after getting help from Hikigaya the festival goes off and we find out she can shred and has got pipes. She flirts with witty banter and finds it easier to do over the comms with Hikigaya at the culture festival.
You get a real sense of her isolation on the school trip, groups are set out by class and we never see her talking with anyone except Yui and Hikigaya. After Hikigaya’s stunt on the school trip we see that when she gets frustrated or upset with people she distances herself from them. She will only step up when called upon, which is why she only runs for student council president when pushed to. But because she does not communicate that it is something that she wants, Yui and Hikigaya oppose this. She is disappointed that they didn’t just understand what she wanted, but as Yui tells her some things just have to be said. You can’t just expect people to understand you all of the time, even if you are close. Open communication is important. After the genuine speech from Hikigaya she ultimately reconciles with the group, although it takes some convincing from Yui. She was definitely about to kiss Hiki in the nurse’s office after the marathon running thing. Even though he backs away she knows how she feels now, there’s no denying it. She can’t find it in herself to give Hiki the Valentine’s cookies she made for him. Even though she knows her feelings, taking that next step is hard for her. She doesn’t feel she is worthy of love and she does not want to do anything that will hurt Yui. She is really struggling to make her own path and it holds her back from her friends. She seems to be her truest self when she is bickering with Hiki, like him she is consumed by their conversations.
She tells her friends that she wanted to go into the family business and didn’t know what to do when being told to choose her own path (with conditions). She still wants it but fears being rejected by her mother. Her final season arc is all about her trying to do things on her own. She thinks that relying on others is cheating and isn’t a real way to show growth (it’s weakness). She keeps the picture from the ride with Hiki on her bed behind Pan-san. That shows how valuable it is to her. She always loses her confidence and rationality when her family’s involved. When they come in to put the kibosh on the prom it is like looking at a different person. Her mom is always wearing a yukata and if anime has taught me one thing it’s to never trust a parent wearing a yukata. She is so sad about her own perceived weaknesses, she thinks relying on others will only make her, herself useless. Even though she has friends for the first time she is feeling lonelier than ever. She stops wearing the computer glasses from Hiki, when she decides to take on making the prom happen by herself. When Hikigaya runs into her by a bench during their prom competition she has a Maxis coffee saying it has just the right amount of sweetness. Maxis coffee is Hikigaya’s favorite brand. They’re always arguing and making everything harder than necessary. She does want Yui to be with Hiki, they’re best friends and they want each other to be happy. She tells Yui that she wants her wish to come true. She sees the end of the prom competition as an ending to her relationships. She tells Hiki her wish is for him to grant Yui’s wish. She then meets with Yui and gives her the impression that the relationship is over. She definitely pushes Hikigaya and Yui away after telling him to fulfill Yui’s wish.
She gets recognition from her mom after putting on the prom, but it is not enough to prove she should be in Haruno’s place. After Haruno calls them out at the prom after party, she thanks Hikigaya for all of his help and tries to let him go, but literally can’t. It’s clear during his confession that she wants him to show more value in himself. She uses her flaws and fears to try to stop it, she’s still struggling to accept that he loves her. Ultimately she accepts it and herself and she asks for his distorted life. These two are incapable of making things simple. It’s adorable to see them go on their first date scouting out prom locations. Their first steps as a couple are awkward, but feel very true. She’s able to say “I love you” to Hikigaya in the finale. The finale ends on a positive note for her as Yui comes into the club room and makes her intentions to maintain a friendship with her clear. It’s clear to see how over the course of the story how Yukino is able to find a community that she is a part of. She’s no longer alone.
Yui Yuigahama
Yui is a sweet, normal girl that is a part of the popular clique at school. This hides a person that lacks self belief and often feels alone even amongst her friends. She is very non confrontational and struggles to speak her mind. Thus allows others to walk all over her, specifically Miura. Her interest in Hiki is apparent from the beginning. She’s in an impossible situation from the moment she shows up, and she knows it. She reveals later in the story that she didn’t want to form real attachments with Hiki and Yukino, but couldn’t deny that she loves them both. In contrast to Yukino she does believe in innate ability and talent and thinks that she lacks it. She wants it all, the friendship and the romance, she calls it selfish but it’s incredibly human. Shr truly does want Yukino to be happy and while it is conflicting she wants her to be with Hiki, while also wanting Hiki herself. That is the core of her character. She’s constantly trying to balance what she wants for herself with what she wants for others.
She fights with Hiki after he accuses her of pitying him because of the car accident. She is hurt that he can’t seem to understand her feelings for him. Unlike the other two she has the desire to go after what she wants, which she intimates in a conversation with Hiki at the school festival. She tells him she won’t wait if there’s no reason to wait, but if there is she will go after what she wants. She has a way of being open without saying the thing directly, you always know where you stand with her. She uses casual contact to show affection, which is very different from Yukino. Our girl shows she’s got some pipes at the culture festival as she’s the lead singer.
As I’ve said she considers herself selfish for wanting to have it all, but ultimately she’s the selfless one, she pushes the others to grow and change and ultimately become people that could love each other and express that. Yui is always between them (physically/ metaphorically) and without her the group would have fallen apart early on. Her relationship with Yukino is the show’s heart, without that the conflict doesn’t exist in the same way. The fact is their friendship matters just as much as her love for Hiki. That’s why she doesn’t do anything to actively alter their relationship. She’s comfortable where things are and wanting it all means fearing losing it all. She’s not like the other two. She’s never been alone before. She also seems to understand their situation more. She resolves herself to settle her feelings after Haruno confronts the trio and uses the three way date at the aquarium to force everyone into recognizing their feelings so they can have a fair fight. This means she can now go after what she wants and she gives Hiki her cookies she made for Valentine’s Day. Knowing how the show ends makes the aquarium date truly heartbreaking, it’s really the last moment that all three of them are truly together.
She has a close relationship with her mom, which is the only close parent relationship on the show (her mom is such a mom, and I love it). Yukino and Hiki have varying levels of support systems, but I’m not really sure who is pushing for Yui, that’s why having her mom present is so important. She just wants her two favorite people to be happy. After she finds the picture we get to hear her internal monologue where she reveals that she feels that what Hiki and Yukino have is special and she has always felt like an interloper. She says she was honestly not looking for something genuine in the club room, but found it in spite of herself. That’s why she can’t let go.
She’s so hard on herself, she hurts because she feels stuck, she can’t go after Hiki and she can’t forget him, she knows that it won’t be her, that what Hiki and Yukino have is different but her feelings are her feelings. Everything in her is currently a contradiction, she can’t help but want Yukino to be happy, while at the same time knowing that it would make her sad.
She feels it all fall apart when Hiki rushes off to help Yukino with the prom. While she’s happy she stopped crying because it allowed Hiki to go to Yukino, she also wishes the tears hadn’t stopped because then he would’ve stayed with her. Having to see her curled up in that alley crying, not being able to keep walking, is like a punch to the gut. She definitely sees the planning of the alternate prom with Hiki as a last time to be together with their current dynamic. She’s determined to help Hiki even though she knows it’s over. She loves him so much she still supports him in his competition with Yukino even though the end result will certainly be bad for her desires. I also like that she still is going to use this time to be close to him. She holds his hand to encourage him when he’s getting the group together and she fakes falling asleep to rest against him in the private room in the library. She’s the most honest to herself about their situation, and has always accepted her feelings for Hiki. She desperately wants Yukino in her life, which is never clearer than when she catches Hiki and Yukino talking and she doesn’t get mad. She makes a bunch of future plans with Yukino for “when all of this is over” that almost certainly aren’t going to happen and they know it. She’s the one that calls out Haruno on her BS, she understands relationships better than the older Haruno. She knows that it’s not codependency that they have, it’s love. She knows that relying on others isn’t weakness. She sees that the way Haruno sees the world is lonely.
When Hiki asks what her wish is she says it’s all the little things. When you add up her wishes it’s clear what she wants, a life together with Hiki. She als tells him she wants to make his wish come true. She is trying to be alone with Hiki both as a last shot and a last time. You can feel her for lack of a better word desperation to be with him, when she invites him over to bake for Komachi. She dances with Hiki at the prom and when she leans into him after she makes her intentions of asking for one more wish clear it feels like the end, but she still wants to be clear. Somehow she finds the strength to push Hiki to accept his feelings and go after Yukino even as she was resolved to tell him how she feels. I honestly can’t comprehend how she does that without breaking down. Ultimately she doesn’t get to directly confess her feelings to Hiki. She holds it together as Hiki walks her home, but breaks down inside and is comforted by her mom. She says love as a word just doesn’t cover her feelings. She says it’s her first experience with romance and it might hurt forever and I’m crying.
When we get to the finale we get to see the return of the early version of Yui, she definitely is putting on a false air and hiding her feelings to help with the prom. I mean obviously she wants to help and we know her wish is at least in part to keep the group together, but honestly the pain must be crushing. She’s seeing her best friend be happy and can’t really enjoy it. She’s putting on a brave face and it’s good to see her with Komachi and Isshiki. It’s nice to know that even with all she’s lost she has still gained new friends over the year that show takes place. That’s right it was just one wild school year. In the end she finds a roundabout way to confess her feelings, although Hiki is not her priority in the scene. It’s important to note the relationship she says she wants to keep is with Yukino, she never even mentions Hiki by name. She obviously still loves Hiki and maybe hasn’t given up on him yet. She has a conversation with Isshiki that leaves the door open for her feelings. She is able to find a community over the course of the show and even though in the end she doesn’t get the love SHE DESERVES (sorry let my emotions get the best of me there) and she grows as a character.
Iroha Isshiki
Iroha Isshiki is everything a girl should be. Kind, cute, effervescent, and a key member of the soccer club she’s got it all. Except it’s all fake. In reality she doesn’t have any real friends and puts on a persona to get the attention she wants. How do you change from that?
It’s kind of crazy that we don’t meet Isshiki until season 2. She becomes such an integral part of the show it’s hard to remember it without her. She really grew on me as a character from where she starts. She probably changes more than any other character. She’s an incredibly vain person, but ultimately she is caring. Isshiki does start as the kind of falsely kind, overly friendly, fake person that Hiki is suspicious of all girls being. He describes her as dangerous because of her ability to wield her charms. We meet her as she comes to the Service Club for help getting out of the student council president election. She was submitted as a prank, but by going to the Service Club she accidentally ends up involved in a powder keg. Her superficiality does not prepare her for our trio and their dynamic. She starts off not all that different from Kaori, the girl from Hiki’s middle school. I don’t know why the bit where she always accuses Hiki of hitting on her is funny, but it always gets a chuckle out of me. She puts on an act because she isn’t confident in herself. This lack of self confidence is exposed
in the meetings with the ‘say nothing’ brigade from the other high school. She does have a serious crush on Hayama but it’s just a crush. She’s not in love with him, but getting rejected when she asks him out at the amusement park still hurts her. She does find a bright spot in the rejection. This ability to bounce back and find positives is her best quality.
Over the course of the story she matures greatly and starts to become an active student council president. As she grows closer to our trio she begins to get more involved in their problems. She also develops a crush on Hikigaya, but is mature enough not to go down that road. I can’t imagine how awkward it was for Isshiki to be in that room with Hiki and Yukino having a wild intimate conversation. She says it’s like they’re both starting a relationship and breaking up. She certainly doesn’t know how to deal with people in such a complicated, yet simple situation and to be honest who can blame her. While she says at first she’s doing the prom for herself, she later reveals she’s actually doing the prom for her seniors and Miss Hiratsuka. She’s becoming selfless and starting to think about others. Hikigaya says that her personality sucks but that she’s actually a good person which is an apt way of putting it. Hikigaya even thinks about how much easier life would be if he had fallen for her. When she asks Hikigaya to join the student council next year she gives him the space to refuse her proposal to join the council (and perhaps more) rather than just asking for his help. She knows that he can’t resist helping if he is asked outright. Yet another sign of maturity.
By the end of the show she can call Hikigaya by his first name which is a big deal in anime. They’re that close. She’s also become close with Yukino and Yui. It’s funny to see Isshiki give Yui advice on dealing with Hiki and Yukino’s relationship. She tells her all she has to do is be patient. It’s okay for a girl to like a guy with a boyfriend. Then she slips up and inadvertently reveals she’s also talking about herself. She’s still got some maturing left.
Haruno Yukinoshita
Haruno Yukinoshita is my messy queen. She’s always pushing others to do things for her own entertainment. Despite being personable and being the heir to the family business her life feels empty. She tells Hikigaya that she can’t get drunk, a part of her mind is always calm and rational. She can’t give herself over to experiences, which separates her from other people. It keeps all of her relationships impersonal. Because of this it’s hard to get a read on her feelings about other people. Does she like them or does she just find them amusing? Her curiosity in Hikigaya is instantly piqued because he’s hanging out with Yukino. She likes exploiting the emotions of others, it’s entertainment for her. She kind of exists as an audience surrogate, like us she is just watching the show, but unlike us she pushes the drama forward. She will never settle for stasis.
She sees herself in Hikigaya, she’s actually a lot like him, but the inverse. She uses a friendly exterior to hide a cold interior. Unlike Hikigaya she surrounds herself with people and uses them. You get the feeling that she is always searching for something. She likes to toy with Yukino, but ultimately I think she wants her to keep progressing. She has a deep understanding of her power over other people. She knows she’s a dominant personality and uses that. Also being someone who doesn’t care always gives you an upper hand as you don’t ever have anything at stake. She says multiple times she doesn’t care about the outcome of the triangle, she only wants to see it find a conclusion. I suppose you could say that’s not very sisterly, but I think she’s just trying to prove something to herself. She doesn’t believe that genuine things exist because she has never experienced them, yet all of her actions are designed to force the trio to cut through the bull shit.
She spends the whole Valentine’s baking event thing just trying to start fires everywhere. She walks into that room full of emotionally vulnerable people and just can’t resist. It’s like crack to her. She doesn’t quite understand the fine distinctions of human relationships like she thinks she does. She can only see what she understands, which is why she considers the trio codependent. She’s never been close enough to anyone to have that type of relationship. However she finds it interesting. That’s what I find most attractive about her character.
She is trying to help in her own way. She feels that pushing them towards a conclusion is also better for them. I’ve gotta be honest, I’m still trying to pinpoint her relationship with Hayama. They’re obviously close in some ways, but the exact nature of their relationship is unclear. She doesn’t really care about her position in the family, but she won’t just let Yukino take her spot. She does support Yukino trying to take it though. In the end she desires resolution. She just wants to see how everything will play out. As a final push she tells Hikigaya that Yukino’s wish is an act of self defense. I think the real reason she is so obsessed with Hikigaya and his situation is that she is trying to prove that either she is right and genuine doesn’t exist, or that even for someone like her there is a chance.
Shizuka Hiratsuka
Shizuka Hiratsuka is just a single teacher in her 30’s who wants to help. She cares deeply for her students and is always trying to help them from behind the scenes. She sees Hikigaya and Yukino and knows that putting them together will be good for them. Sadly she doesn’t seem to have much going on outside of school. I think she’s trying to help her students to take advantage of youth in a way that she didn’t. She is blunt when she needs to be and gives Hikigaya the guidance of an adult. She brings an entirely different perspective than the other characters. She is a teacher down to her soul and there’s never a moment where she isn’t on some level trying to help someone. She’s kind of the opposite side of Haruno’s coin. She pushes the same stuff but in a kinder and less pressured way. She gives them space, but will also push Hikigaya when she has to. She always does it with encouragement though.
She can be a bit immature, she is a big fan of shounen stories and has a bit of a chunibyo side. She’s insecure that she’s single at her age. She’s perhaps the character I see the most of my current self in.
She tries to get Hikigaya not just to get friends, but to truly understand and give himself over to his feelings. Her biggest flaw is that she’s probably too open with Hikigaya. I would say that their relationship isn’t always kosher, when you’re a teacher you definitely shouldn’t pick up your student in your hot rod and then stop on a bridge and have a convo with some odd romantic undertones. She gets flustered when Hikigaya ponders if he was only ten years older. That’s not cool, teach. Despite this, she still gives good advice. She tells him that thoughts and emotions conflict leading to irrational behavior, but that’s not wrong. It’s only natural. You can’t rationalize everything in your head. Sometimes you just gotta feel. It’s impossible not to hurt people, but that’s ok. Relationships necessitate pain, but pain in and of itself isn’t a bad thing. We’ve all seen Inside Out all of our emotions are valid. She tells him the present isn’t the only thing that matters, but you can’t waste it. It’s important to balance the two. Just because something hasn’t happened doesn’t mean it won’t later. She’s telling him that even if Yukino doesn’t change now, she still might later. What’s important is that he decides if he wants to be there to help her change. He has to make the choice himself. It’s so valuable to have this perspective on the show. She’s also gotta stop smoking on her students.
After his confrontation with Haruno, she takes out Hikigaya to give him some final advice and that final push to make a decision. She tells him you can express yourself with one word, all the words, your actions, or you can express yourself any other way you can think of. The important thing is to be clear and honest. She is leaving the school after the year and the second prom is her last event. While it’s super unkosher to dance with your student I suppose for them it works in their weird relationship. She tells him that he is her favorite student. She is exists as the teacher that every lonely kid wishes they had. She sees what’s going on and she acts on things. They say youth is wasted on the young and her goal is to stop that from happening. She is and adult looking back on youth and is determined that her students will not waste it. We all could have used someone like her in our lives. She makes the world a little less lonely.
Hayato Hayama
Hayato Hayama just has a way of having things work out for him. He presents as an all around good guy, but is he nice? He certainly doesn’t think so. He has a history with Yukino and her family. He has a problem with Hikigaya because of their contrasting ideologies and approaches. He is also jealous of Hikigaya’s ability to help others. It’s unclear if he is into Yukino romantically.
He forced Hikigaya to sacrifice himself on the school trip because it was convenient for him. He feared losing his comfortable present, but wasn’t willing to put himself out there. Losing Yukino clearly left scars that have affected his actions and personality. He sets up quite the elaborate plan during the double date to show Hiki that Yui and Yukino care about him. He does this as penance for what he made Hikigaya do. He is trying to repair something that he helped break. He also can’t abide owing Hikigaya one.
He really puts in the work to maintain his reputation, but he also seems to want someone to get him. It’s the conundrum that defines him. He is seemingly unable to mess with the status quo, but he’s also searching for something new. He’s the most popular person around and is never alone, but it all feels like a lie. He’s incredibly lonely because he’s never his real self. Unbeknownst to Hikigaya, he is always comparing himself to him. In a lot of ways he’s in his own different story. I’d be curious to see the story from his angle. He doesn’t make choices and his fear of hurting others or messing with the status quo holds him back. There’s certainly a chance he’s actually in love with Haruno, but it’s pretty unclear from the show. I was disappointed that we didn’t spend much time with him in the final season. His story is very much unfinished.
The Rest
Komachi Hikigaya is absolutely full of energy. She is also the only person that Hikigaya cares about at the start. She’s constantly frustrated by her brother’s inability to read social cues and often finds ways to disappear or flake when Yui or Yukino try to make plans with him. She pulls out her brother’s emotions and is actually able to get him to open up. She also cries when she thanks him for everything. At the end she joins the Service Club.
Yoshiteru Zaimokuza is crazy, but he is a haas. His chunibyo makes for good comedy. He is ultimately a decent guy. He’s in and out of the story. He’s helpful, but a bit underdeveloped.
Hina Ebina is a lot of fun. Her obsession with yaoi and forcing it onto her surroundings makes for good comedy. She also has a good serious side. She is clear about what she wants and works to keep her world the way she likes it, comfortable. Status quo. She certainly understands Hiki’s personality and gives us insight on him. (He is only comfortable being honest with superfluous people to his life.) She also sees the world from a distance and has a good understanding of the people around her and their interpersonal dynamics. What really makes her unique as a character is that she is both a kinda chunibyo wallflower and a part of the cool kids clique. It’s amazing that both feel so natural to her character.
Yumiko Miura is just kind of your typical mean girl. She definitely tries to alpha the other girls, which cause conflict with Yukino. She does care about her friends. Status quo. She’s definitely crushing on Hayato, but I’m not sure how real that is. The scene where she confronts Hiki over not hurting Yui is critical. It lets us see that someone on the outside is on Yui’s side.
Saika Totsuka is a fellow classmate of Hikigaya. He is extremely cute and is often mistaken for a girl. He’s the captain of the tennis club, but lacks confidence in his ability. After getting help he is the first person to openly befriend Hikigaya. Throughout the show he is always willing to lend a hand when able. He also gains a lot of confidence in his abilities.
Saki Kawasaki is a bit of an enigma. She comes off as very cold at first, but we find out she is making a lot of sacrifices to help her family. She is good at sewing and despite constant complaints always helps out in the end. I get the feeling her character’s role was cut way back on the show. I feel this way mostly because of this weird scene in the season 3 premiere where it’s hinted she’s been holding onto a moment where Hikigaya offhandedly said “I love you” when she gave him some info. It’s obviously one of those meaningless “I love yous”, but it must mean something to make the show. It’s a head scratcher.
Meguri Shiromeguri is maybe the best person we meet. Her kindness endears her to everyone. She is the student council president at the start of the show and requested the help of the Service Club for the sport’s festival. She is surprised when the Service Club doesn’t take on the student council job. She thought Yukino would be president and Yui and Hikigaya would be council members. Her graduation speech moves a variety of characters, showing her reach.
OK, now that that’s settled I have a lot of things I want to get off my chest about how the show ended.
Rant Time
OK so I know I promised a rant and there will be one, but I first have two things to say. One the light novel series is still continuing so the story itself is ongoing. Also after watching the show a second time I do feel a little differently than from my Season 3 diary. Now let’s get into the show’s conclusion.
I’m just going to be straightforward here and confess that as Team Yui my opinions are incredibly biased. I’ll admit that for the other characters the conclusion actually works really well, even if the season up until that point never really came together for me. However, looking at this as a series finale, and that is how the show is sold, Yui is just left hanging. We don’t get a good read on Hiki’s feelings towards Yui. The show bales on any resolution there. Hikigaya is never forced to confront her feelings head on and it left me feeling incredibly hollow. Watching the final few episodes again only confirmed this feeling. We get a sustained build up to a confession and while it is clear that she would get turned down I feel it doesn’t fit the spirit of the show. We were supposed to be building to something genuine and honest and Yui was not given that chance. You could argue it’s kindness to spare her rejection that way, but one she still feels all of that pain and two it keeps a kind of stasis that is false around her relationships. We even see Yui return to the false, cheery version of herself that put her feelings aside to keep things kopacetic. They save any real confession and emotional honesty for the very end of the episode and at that point there’s no time to deal with it. Presenting that as a happy ending is so fake. It pisses me off! Again as this the show’s conclusion it feels like the show is shirking off any consequences for what happened with their characters. There are three seasons of tension full of the characters doing everything possible to avoid being open about their situation because they know the ending can’t work out for everyone, but this finale ignores all of that. It not only sells Yui short, but it takes a lot of the emotional pop out of how hard the experience has been on Hikigaya and Yukino as well. By letting us feel at the very end that it can all just be settled I feel sold short. For this to be the end just doesn’t feel right.
The good news is that the story will continue in light novel form and I have some thoughts on things that could happen or that I would like to see happen.
Hopes For The Future
I’m going to start with my thoughts on what to do with Yui. Let’s start with what will happen between her and Hiki. To me their relationship is functionally over. We get a hint of this in the final scene and also from Hikigaya says he’s going to get rid of the relationships he’s broken and replace them with something real. It would be impossible to be alone with him in the way they were. They were incredibly close, but it wasn’t built on friendship. I’m not saying they aren’t friends, it’s just that she had romantic feelings for him from the beginning. Also because we don’t know what his feelings towards her really are it’s hard to understand what their relationship even could be. Also the thing she wants would be the thing that would hurt her friend the most and we know her priority right now is Yukino. Also Hiki is not the type of person to push the issue. You combine that with Yui’s general proclivity to avoid doing things that will mess with the status quo and you have a recipe for avoidance. And as long as that’s the case they can’t build anything real. Even though she indirectly confessed to him it wasn’t in any way that will force them to deal with it. It’s also unclear after her conversation with Isshiki in the finale if she intends to try to move on from her feelings or not. I’m not sure how they will handle this, but I believe Yui at the very least deserves the chance to be open and get angry. I’m not saying any of the characters did something wrong, but she can’t move on if she doesn’t express herself fully. I also think it would be powerful if she stopped calling him Hiki and started calling him Hikigaya.
As far as her relationship with Yukino, that’s a bit trickier. While her relationship with Hikigaya is actually pretty simple, the one with Yukino isn’t. We know they are each other’s best friends and we’ve seen how important their relationship is. I would argue their relationship is the most important one. It’s really their bond that holds the group together, but it was also the source of so much of the tension. How they keep their relationship will be interesting. For the most part they’ll be fine, but how do they deal with the elephant in the room. It was one thing before Hikigaya chose, but now Yukino’s problems will feel a bit like rubbing it in. I actually think their bond is strong enough that they can make it work. Although that could obviously change if Yui and Hiki started getting closer again.
As for Yukino and Hikigaya, it’s all about how two people who suck at communicating and like handling their problems alone make a relationship work. We’ve already seen Yukino say “I love you” and Hikigaya certainly doesn’t seem close to actually saying it. Although I don’t see that being a problem, I’m curious what happens when they do have a real conflict. While Hikigaya now has a support system he’s not the type to seek out advice. Yukino’s three closest friends are either interested in Hikigaya, Yui and Isshiki, or his sister. That should lead to some conflict. Having seen a lot of anime I doubt there’s any chance they ever break up, but if they want to embrace the teen soap, rom-com of the story they could. I really need to let my Team Yui hopes die. It ain’t happening.
I’m curious how they deal with the dynamics of the final year of high school. We know Yukino’s ambitions, but we don’t really know what anyone else wants to do. Also the classes have changed so it will put distance between some characters, but also bring others together.
We know the Service Club will be back, but I’m not sure if Yui will be in it. I assume she’ll be there, but it won’t be the same. We know Komachi is joining, but it would be interesting to see them throw someone new into the club to shake up the dynamic even more. I’d love to see Hikigaya and Yukino try to deal with a stranger.
One thing I’d really like to see is more of a focus on other characters than Hikigaya. I’ve never read the light novels, so maybe it’s different there, but we basically spend all of our time on the show with him. I feel like we now know these other characters enough to spend time with them. I’d love to see some stories from Yui and Yukino’s perspectives. Especially outside of Hikigaya. I’m also fascinated by Hayama. He’s so in and out of the story. I find it hard to get a read on him. I’d love to see what his daily life is like. I know he’s going to be in Hikigaya’s class so I’m excited to see how they continue to clash.
I’m also fascinated by where they go with Isshiki. She’s in a weird spot. She’s a year younger than our leads, but from all appearances they’re her only friends. She’s also into Hikigaya, but with no real belief that anything could happen. She’s not in the same place as Yui. I do think it would be cool if she brought in Yui to fill the empty spot on the student council. However, I think it’s important for her to make bonds within her own class as well. She won’t graduate with her friends so I think it’s important that she doesn’t forget to make new friends so she won’t be lonely in the future.
Alright I think that’s enough for now. If it isn’t already obvious this show really hit me in my core. It really found a way to exploit all of my regrets and insecurities while also allowing me to really enjoy it as well. This show is scientifically engineered to hit me deep. I’ve become a little obsessed. OK maybe a lot. If you’ve made it till the end thank you, and leave a comment, you must have something to say. It’s been a journey.