It’s Opening Day in MLB. (I know it snuck up on me too.) A new season means predictions and who am I to deprive you of my preseason picks. I’ll be going through each division giving what I’m sure will be perfectly accurate predictions for every team and then my playoff predictions. If I’m right I’ll claim all of the credit and if I’m wrong, well I’ll probably be wrong.
NL East
1) New York Mets
2) Atlanta Braves (WC)
3) Washington Nationals
4) Philadelphia Phillies
5) Miami Marlins
The Mets are really freaking good. Their offense was every bit as good as any other in the NL last year and now they’ve added Francisco Lindor, conservatively a top 2 shortstop in baseball. They’ve also got Marcus Stroman and Noah Syndergaard coming back to the starting rotation from injury as well as the addition of Carlos Carrasco from Cleveland. The only concern there is health, but that’s a concern for all teams. The bullpen seems fine, which is about the best you can hope for. There are only two real concerns for the Mets, their defense is porous and they’re the Mets so something is bound to go wrong.
Taking the Braves to finish 2nd is probably a defense mechanism for me, but I’ve got some real concerns. There isn’t a lot of depth on the roster and if Austin Reilly and Christian Pache don’t hit it’s a six man lineup. The loss of the DH hurts the defense as it will force Ozuna into left field, Acuña and Pache should be good enough for the defense to be good. The rotation is like the lineup, where the top five looks good on paper, but the depth behind that is yikes. There are a lot of questions about the bullpen, but bullpen performance is so random it’s hard to be overly concerned before you see it. It should be quite the Pennant race between these two teams.
The Phillies and Nationals both look like pretty mediocre teams, but for opposite reasons. Everything about the Phillies is meh and look headed for another year around .500. The Nationals on the other are a stars and scrubs roster. Juan Soto might be the best hitter in baseball, but other than Trea Turner there isn’t much to excite you. Their rotation has three horses and the less said after that the better. One of these teams will probably contend, but who knows which one.
The Marlins stink. They have good starting pitching, but the offense is blech. Enjoy last year’s run because it was an outlier.
NL Central
1) St Louis Cardinals
2) Milwaukee Brewers
3) Chicago Cubs
4) Cincinnati Reds
5) Pittsburgh Pirates
No one in the top four teams in this division stands out. Honestly I wouldn’t have any of them over any of the top four in the east. For that reason any of them could take the division.
The Cardinals added Nolan Arenado which looks like an organization trying so I picked them. Christian Yelich should bounce back this year and Craig Counsel always figures out the bullpen giving the Brewers a chance. The Cubs will be hoping some of their pending free agents have contract years to buoy them. The Reds have some good pitching “as there’s a drive into deep left field by Castellanos and that’ll be a home run”.
The Pirates are awful. Their only use will be to artificially inflate the wins total for whoever comes out of this god forsaken division.
NL West
1) Los Angeles Dodgers
2)San Diego Padres (WC)
3) San Francisco Giants
4) Arizona Diamondbacks
5) Colorado Rockies
The Dodgers are a perfect team. They have no holes. Their depth is ridiculous. They could put two different elite starting rotations. Even if they somehow do find a problem no one else can compete with them financially, so they’ll fix it. The only real question is whether they can set the wins record.
The Padres have an awesome team. Maybe even the third best in baseball. Starters, relievers, offense, defense they have it all. They’ve got all-stars in Manny Machado and baseball’s next superstar Fernando Tatis Jr. This team is great and they have no chance in this division.
The Giants, D-backs, and Rockies are both bad and unfortunate to be in a division with the other two teams. They better beat each other because otherwise wins are gonna be hard to come by.
AL East
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1) New York Yankees
2) Tampa Bay Rays (WC)
3) Toronto Blue Jays
4) Boston Red Sox
5) Baltimore Orioles
The Yankees look unstoppable on paper, but that’s been true for a few years. It’s simple with them. If they’re healthy it’ll be an easy season. If not then they could still win the division. That’s how good they are.
The Rays and Blue Jays will both be good and compete for the Wild Card. I don’t know how the Rays will do it, but I know they will. The Blue Jays will ride the sons of your favorite player from when you were a kid to great success.
The Red Sox don’t seem like they’re trying so I won’t. Baltimore… things will get better?
AL Central
1) Minnesota Twins
2) Chicago White Sox (WC)
3) Cleveland Indians
4) Kansas City Royals
5) Detroit Tigers
The Twins and White Sox are both good teams that will benefit from a lousy division. For that reason the team that comes in second will make the Wild Card game. I’m picking the Twins because I don’t like Tony LaRussa and the Eloy Jimenez injury will hurt the White Sox.
Cleveland will still find good pitching, but the offense will be brutal, and not in a good way. For the Royals and Tigers there’s always next year, or more accurately five years from now.
AL West
1) Houston Astros
2) Los Angeles Angels
3) Oakland A’s
4) Seattle Mariners
5) Texas Rangers
Guys the Astros are still gonna be awesome. This might be the last year they’re awesome, but this division looks like theirs. They have the best offense and Justin Verlander should be back to stabilize a surprisingly strong rotation.
I’m picking the Angels to be good this year because it’s 2021 and we deserve something fun. I want to live in a world where the team with Mike Trout and Shohei Otani is awesome. I’m tired of the A’s. They’ll be good again and no one will be able to say for certain why.
The Mariners have some fun young players, but as we know they don’t seem to have much interest in playing them. The Rangers stink and their new stadium is ugly. At least Joey Gallo hits dingers.
Playoffs
WC Games
NL- Padres over Braves
These games are random, except for the fact the Braves losing is always predictable.
AL- White Sox over Rays
I like the White Sox starters and they have more difference making bats, so why not them?
Division Series
NL- Dodgers over Cardinals/ Mets over Padres
The Dodgers are perfect and in a 5 game series I’ll take the team running Jacob Degrom out there twice.
AL- Yankees over White Sox/ Astros over Twins
The Yankees will have too much for a young White Sox team that will be actively feuding with their manager by then. The Astros are kings of making the LCS.
League Championship Series
NL- Dodgers over Mets
Baseball is random. Playoff baseball is extra random. Only a fool would pick against the Dodgers.
AL- Astros over Yankees
In a rematch of the nipple buzzer series I’m taking the Astros for the memes. Sure the Yankees are better, but the Astros winning is way funnier.
World Series
Dodgers over Astros
In a rematch of the World Series defined by trash cans, this time the Dodgers will take it. They are inevitable and unlike Thanos they can back it up.
So there you have it. I’ve just told you everything that will happen this season so now you don’t have to watch it. You should still watch, you know, just in case.